New Age Trappings starting with Gratitude
Call this a rant, (it certainly is) and maybe I’m an ungrateful person for writing this, (god dammit) but when I blog, I write about what is closest to me and right now my awareness level around ‘new age’ words and how they are used to unconsciously sidestep emotions is closest to me.
So let’s start with gratitude. Don’t get me wrong, gratitude is the fastest path to abundance, an extremely high frequency and a beautiful space to be in. The more gratitude we feel the more abundance we create. It’s a true joy in the right context and when I’m centered and my life is flowing then gratitude and feeling thankful is one of life’s blessings and flows from me in abundance. Of course I’m grateful, for the life I normally lead, the wonderful people around me and the ability to feel my heart, my dreams, having a healthy body but here’s where it goes wrong for me…
Gratitude and Suffering
I recently got hit with a huge dark night of the soul. It was enormous. My entire world collapsed, financially, emotionally and in a very traumatic way. My life became very scary; I was unable to work due to the ‘emotional stuff’ so the financial loss which was my entire life savings became a huge problem. It’s hard to separate crazy stuff when several things land on your lap at once and being unable to do anything about it leaves you feeling full of despair and definitely tested to the maximum in faith. I had to clear and work on the emotional stuff before I could look at anything else.
Most of my friends were absolutely wonderful and even the ones that pushed my buttons were only trying to help so my heart is blessed to have so much loving support but, here’s what not to do when someone is in their deepest darkest moments.
Do not tell them to be grateful. You are likely to have your head knocked off your shoulders. We have emotions for a reason and when we are suffering we do not give two shits if someone has it worst or what we have left. Trauma and shock take away the ability to be rational. They strangle the heart and squeeze it like a sponge until it is wrung out and dry, devoid of anything but an empty hollow feeling that needs to replenish.
Large heavy emotions are felt for a reason and when we are in that space we certainly do not feel grateful. Gratitude comes with time, love, patience and insights after those moments. Those messages take deep introspection, intense processing and a shift in perspective. When someone is at their lowest point all they need is a hug, a good listener and someone in tune enough with their own emotional body that is able to hold the space and ask the right questions for true healing and insights to occur which happens when we are allowed to feel our deepest darkest parts.
None of us are all rainbows and butterflies. We carry light and dark energy. In order to transcend our darkness we must feel it, breathe light into it and be authentic with ourselves. The emotional body is going through a purification process. Let it be what it is. If I am not feeling grateful, allow that. It’ll pass. We all recover quickly when we are allowed to be ourselves.
Gratitude and Authenticity
So… new age preachers, think before you speak. Gratitude for me is something organic. It comes from my heart naturally, spontaneously and in huge bursts of love in its own time when balance is restored.
On my deepest level I am always grateful for who I am and what I have but on an emotional level, me and anyone that is feeling an intense amount of suffering needs to feel accepted for where they are at in that moment. That level of deep meeting of needs inspires the most amazing overwhelming amount of gratitude and it comes from the freedom of the ability to express what is truly being breathed and felt in the moment providing the most glorious, uplifting transformation. That’s the heart for me of gratitude when you’re in pain, the ability to be yourself with people that love and accept where you are at. No level of ‘advice’, ‘rescuing’ or ‘saving’ is going to help in the darkest moments because no one in an intense emotional space has ears to hear, they are feeling and feelings need to be felt in order to move. When they are feeling safe, heard, met and valued then gratitude is enormous, all encompassing!!! Then gratitude is restored back to its highest grace rather than being verbally volunteered at the most inappropriate moment.